a man is only as faithful as his options...

[gogo]

...is something chris rock said in one of his specials. which of course cracked me up but if applied in real life....not as funny. of course the line could also say "a woman is only as faithful as her options".

just wanted to know what you guys think. i've seen the dating help thread and attractive points thread....i'm sure there are others where something like this might have been covered, but oh well!

the general idea i really want to get to is why do you, or other people you know, stay in relationships other than "love" or other romantic ideals. do you stay b/c being with that person is comfortable and safe? are you too lazy to find other people? maybe you've been burned so many times in the past you just don't want to try again so you take and keep the first person that feels kind of safe. or are you just waiting until something better comes along? or any other reason?

thanks for stopping by and for your comments!!

[Windúril]

Ooo...gogo posted a serious thread! I'm in shock! =o

[Babbo]

Ooo...gogo posted a serious thread! I'm in shock! =o
0_0

gogo posted 0_0

[Ramza]

O.o

mods are shocked!

[pheonixfire]

Well, after being burned in the past, things have become more difficult in that area. I don't casually date. If I like you and you like me, and this is something that we both want, then we could date. I will not ESPESIALLY (not spelled right) give out my number to guys that I have just met and that seemed "nice" when I met them. No "hey girl whats ur name, can I call u" junk. I made that mistake once before....hey I was like, almost 14. I will especially not go out with someone just because they are cute. So blah.

[Who]

I stay with someone because they make me happy, I leave because they don't. Simple as that.

[pheonixfire]

I stay with someone because they make me happy, I leave because they don't. Simple as that.

Sorry I got a lil off topic on the first post, but I agree with minty. *high 5's Minty*

I think that if your not with someone for the right reasons, no matter how "innocent" you may think they are, ppl will onlly get hurt in the process. If u are with someone because they are "safe" and you are comfortable, and you lack those speacial feelings, you only end up hurt in the long run, and I'm sure that the other one will too. Same goes for those who stay so they won't hurt the others feelings. It only makes things worse when a heart is untrue.

[Katsuki]

Sorry I got a lil off topic on the first post, but I agree with minty. *high 5's Minty*

I think that if your not with someone for the right reasons, no matter how "innocent" you may think they are, ppl will onlly get hurt in the process. If u are with someone because they are "safe" and you are comfortable, and you lack those speacial feelings, you only end up hurt in the long run, and I'm sure that the other one will too. Same goes for those who stay so they won't hurt the others feelings. It only makes things worse when a heart is untrue.

So true... that car needs two drivers. XD

[Who]

Yup, if someone's feelings aren't true anymore, or never were, they need to end it. Someone will end up getting hurt that way.

[♠ Saint ♠]

Mmm... if I get bored, annoyed, or angry enough, I'll sever the emotional connection and leave. There's a variety of reasons why I'd leave someone and a variety of reasons why I'd stay with them.

[Windúril]

I stay with someone because they make me happy, I leave because they don't. Simple as that.

Shhh! Minty! You're giving away that you know nothing about relationships! >.>;

Note: If you did not get the joke in this message, it is to imply that there is nothing "simple" about relationships. X3 *gives Minty a "Feel the Love <3" cookie*

[pheonixfire]

LOL love is nothing even close to simple.but we all luv u minty!

[Soul Slayer]

I was burnt and the excuse was pretty much a cover up of the fact she found another option.

I won't say all people are like this. Far from it. But some people are too extreme and never explore options whereas some jump from one to another with little tolerance for regularity.

[kokoninja]

There are a lot of levels to relationships..

It depends on how serious. And there are different sides.

I'm a firm believer that it takes more than just love to make it through a relationship, especially one in which you plan on spending the rest of your life with someone.

On the same token, a love worth fighting for requires sacrafice and cooperation on both sides.
That's the way love is. Can't be defined, really, it changes from person to person, couple to couple.

But... you know you truly love someone if you're willing to hurt for their sake, or give something up. To surpass human selfishness is when you know it's real.

So leaving because you're "not happy" just like that is selfish. : /

[Windúril]

There are a lot of levels to relationships..

It depends on how serious. And there are different sides.

I'm a firm believer that it takes more than just love to make it through a relationship, especially one in which you plan on spending the rest of your life with someone.

On the same token, a love worth fighting for requires sacrafice and cooperation on both sides.
That's the way love is. Can't be defined, really, it changes from person to person, couple to couple.

But... you know you truly love someone if you're willing to hurt for their sake, or give something up. To surpass human selfishness is when you know it's real.

So leaving because you're "not happy" just like that is selfish. : /

Yes and this is something that is becoming more and more important in today's society. You can love a person a lot, but they need to be able to do things in the long term for you. In short...it helps on your side of the relationship if you're responsable. ^^

[kazfz]

how many people would consider long term.......even those that are married are getting divorce papers to be done beocoz one says "i no longer have feelings for you", thats bad!!! in court, u hardly every see any man that would win women
The person who got involve can also be sued if you ever met a women who knows all the law stuff!!.....check ur pocket before u think of marrying and divorcing with someone :D :D

[SoulBerry]

A man is only as faithful as his options... that would be true, except things like conscience and ethics get in the way sometimes.

Maybe, "Most men are only faithful as his options."

Remember,

A generalization is always false.

[Travis]

I've never cheated on a girl that was my girlfriend before, and I don't intend to. Yeah I think it depends on the way someone is, their morals and stuff like that.

[europegop]

I'm not quite so hard to leave behind....
when someone says to me that a man is only as faithful as his options, although it was a joke, I have to say that it is only half a man. I guess maybe it's just my loyal nature (born in the year of the Dog...) but I couldn't imagine superficially leaving somone just because another "option" looked better at that one moment. I've had many offers, politely turned them down. I suppose it's the emotional level I put into a relationship that keeps me going...because even getting cheated on myself doesn't slow me down. It just means you work harder. And you wreck the other dude's car with a baseball bat.... :p just kidding....
not really.... :D
Like I said, I'm loyal to the core. I believe that it's stubborn loyalty that makes a man/woman have character. It's not just something you can meagerly throw away for a few minutes of one-upmanship. it grows in you over time til it becomes you. Even if it's just the ideal you live for or there are emotional ties, you have to keep digging until you find the answer to stay. some people say that this part of chivalry is dead. I say they didn't let it live in themselves to know the difference.
but that's just one man's opinion. take it or leave it if you will, but I'll still be clutching onto it like the dog I am... :D

[PINOY]

People have their opinions on just about everything men and women do. It's like what they say "Men are from Mars and Women from Venus".

Some of us guys ARE faithful, you just have to look in the right places. :D

[dar]

true.. there are some mean so blinded by love that they turn a blind eye to some things.. well SOME of them are..:D

[Pixie]

i stay with someone who is........*deep breath*........
fun
funny
loves sex
is good at sex
is sexy
is artistic
has stuff in common with me(lotsa stuff)
likes good music
is interesting and weird
is cute
not afraid of PDA
plays with me
cuddles me
makes me randy
cares for me
sexy
dances lol
sexy
is not boring
loves me
(i gotta love them too,obviously!)
is big and strong and sexy
is protective
is mysterious
is kinky(!!!)
is older
is smart
is sweet
is faithful
is kind
has a big c**k
the list goes on and on.......!


well,thats not too much to ask for..............*flutters eyelashes*

i have it anyway! im a lucky girly!!!!!!! :D :p :) :D

[Travis]

i stay with someone who is........*deep breath*........
fun
funny
loves sex
is good at sex
is sexy
is artistic
has stuff in common with me(lotsa stuff)
likes good music
is interesting and weird
is cute
not afraid of PDA
plays with me
cuddles me
makes me randy
cares for me
sexy
dances lol
sexy
is not boring
loves me
(i gotta love them too,obviously!)
is big and strong and sexy
is protective
is mysterious
is kinky(!!!)
is older
is smart
is sweet
is faithful
is kind
has a big c**k
the list goes on and on.......!


well,thats not too much to ask for..............*flutters eyelashes*

i have it anyway! im a lucky girly!!!!!!! :D :p :) :D
hehe, did you mean to put this in attractive points thread? :D :p

[smidglet]

i stay with someone who is........*deep breath*........
fun
funny
loves sex
is good at sex
is sexy
is artistic
has stuff in common with me(lotsa stuff)
likes good music
is interesting and weird
is cute
not afraid of PDA
plays with me
cuddles me
makes me randy
cares for me
sexy
dances lol
sexy
is not boring
loves me
(i gotta love them too,obviously!)
is big and strong and sexy
is protective
is mysterious
is kinky(!!!)
is older
is smart
is sweet
is faithful
is kind
has a big c**k
the list goes on and on.......!


well,thats not too much to ask for..............*flutters eyelashes*

i have it anyway! im a lucky girly!!!!!!! :D :p :) :D
sounds like a good list to me :p

[Elehayym]

i stay with someone who is........*deep breath*........
fun
funny
loves sex
is good at sex
is sexy
is artistic
has stuff in common with me(lotsa stuff)
likes good music
is interesting and weird
is cute
not afraid of PDA
plays with me
cuddles me
makes me randy
cares for me
sexy
dances lol
sexy
is not boring
loves me
(i gotta love them too,obviously!)
is big and strong and sexy
is protective
is mysterious
is kinky(!!!)
is older
is smart
is sweet
is faithful
is kind
has a big c**k
the list goes on and on.......!


well,thats not too much to ask for..............*flutters eyelashes*

i have it anyway! im a lucky girly!!!!!!! :D :p :) :D
....O.o
first off, that's a long list
second, too much info for my innocent mind >_<

[epicbard]

the general idea i really want to get to is why do you, or other people you know, stay in relationships other than "love" or other romantic ideals. do you stay b/c being with that person is comfortable and safe? are you too lazy to find other people? maybe you've been burned so many times in the past you just don't want to try again so you take and keep the first person that feels kind of safe. or are you just waiting until something better comes along? or any other reason?

thanks for stopping by and for your comments!!

i don't know if you can find the right answer to this in here. i think what you are asking, is something we all deal with when we are in a relationship with someone. I think its all on a case by case basis. I don't think you can apply a grand unified answer to every and all situations. And after all this has to be your decision....

I think that if you have to ask yourself this question then you already know the answer but are afraid of what it really is. Maybe its a struggle between an emotional response vs. a logical one. That is to say your logic tells you one thing but your emotions dictate otherwise.

[smidglet]

i don't know if you can find the right answer to this in here. i think what you are asking, is something we all deal with when we are in a relationship with someone. I think its all on a case by case basis. I don't think you can apply a grand unified answer to every and all situations. And after all this has to be your decision....

I think that if you have to ask yourself this question then you already know the answer but are afraid of what it really is. Maybe its a struggle between an emotional response vs. a logical one. That is to say your logic tells you one thing but your emotions dictate otherwise.
O_o did that just come out of epi? wow he has more than the cute pics and one liners ;) :p

[Windúril]

i don't know if you can find the right answer to this in here. i think what you are asking, is something we all deal with when we are in a relationship with someone. I think its all on a case by case basis. I don't think you can apply a grand unified answer to every and all situations. And after all this has to be your decision...

Good thing Joseph Campbell doesn't visit these forums. :p

[smidglet]

Good thing Joseph Campbell doesn't visit these forums. :p
:confused: who is joseph campbell?

[jewlreya]

...is something chris rock said in one of his specials. which of course cracked me up but if applied in real life....not as funny. of course the line could also say "a woman is only as faithful as her options".

just wanted to know what you guys think. i've seen the dating help thread and attractive points thread....i'm sure there are others where something like this might have been covered, but oh well!

the general idea i really want to get to is why do you, or other people you know, stay in relationships other than "love" or other romantic ideals. do you stay b/c being with that person is comfortable and safe? are you too lazy to find other people? maybe you've been burned so many times in the past you just don't want to try again so you take and keep the first person that feels kind of safe. or are you just waiting until something better comes along? or any other reason?

thanks for stopping by and for your comments!!
*gasps* Gogo posted!!!!! Anyway...back to topic.
Hmm..cos I feel safe? I don't know actually. ><
I think I'm probably one of those in bold.
But well, some times love really sux. Sorry, but it's true sometimes. I used to be all romantic and sweet but the world is full of reality so face it. Love is never equal, some give more, some give less, some never even want to give anything.

However, some couples staying together might not means that they are in love or anything. Maybe it's just a habit of seeing each other, talking to each other and maybe more than that. Or there is something that just bind them together and they can't just break off. Things like they have been together for too long, had sex and got into trouble. - seen cases like that.

So it's hard to say, it depends on the partner as well.

[pheonixfire]

:confused: who is joseph campbell?

Joseph campbell is this guy who did all these "power of myth" vidoes and books which is sort of a structural anylasis for things.....for expample i have studied structural anylasis so in the class we could take a story and break it down into structures...(for lack of a better word...) like at first there would be (just so yall know i don't really remember any particular stories, so im just gonna make it up:

1)hero searches for lost object (magical golden ring)
2)hero does something stupid-decent of the hero (he steals the wrong one causing an all out war)
3)hero passes a test of virtue or morals (he helps an old lady who was about to get crushed by a falling peice of stone)
4)hero is given something for passing-this will always come in handy later on (given a flying magic carpet)
5)return from darkness (hero does something to redeem himself)
Ect......
ok, so that may not have been a good example, but i took the class a good 2 years ago, so im a little fuzzy on it. but yea;h, he pretty much just analyzes stories all sprts of stories, from movies to ancient myths or creation stories, and breaks them down so that we can see a certain patern that follows.

[Soul Slayer]

i stay with someone who is........*deep breath*........
fun
funny
loves sex
is good at sex
is sexy
is artistic
has stuff in common with me(lotsa stuff)
likes good music
is interesting and weird
is cute
not afraid of PDA
plays with me
cuddles me
makes me randy
cares for me
sexy
dances lol
sexy
is not boring
loves me
(i gotta love them too,obviously!)
is big and strong and sexy
is protective
is mysterious
is kinky(!!!)
is older
is smart
is sweet
is faithful
is kind
has a big c**k
the list goes on and on.......!


well,thats not too much to ask for..............*flutters eyelashes*

i have it anyway! im a lucky girly!!!!!!! :D :p :) :D

You know...in marketing surveys...90% of people can't even name 10 things they like in their partner...

Sooooo...with a list as long as that...I think you're very very lucky and well off! It's always a good thing to know what you want...otherwise disaster is waiting to happen.

[Windúril]

Eh...phoenix did a pretty good job. Lemme just add a bit...

*The actual term is archetype.
*Archetypes are concepts or ideas that run throughout the entirety of the human race. They are themes that we are all born with and commonly bonded to others through. This is why two scientists from completely different cultures on completely different sides of the world can come up with nearly identical ideas or concepts.
*Joseph Campbell, as phoenix said, was extremely big on this, and is the leading expert on the theory.
*I said it as a joke because Epic had said there was no unifying or common way for love, whereas archetypes teach the opposite.

And no, I do not believe in all of the stuff Campbell has said, though it is all quite fascinating...

[pheonixfire]

yeah, good job wind! We just used him in terms of researching and identifiying similarities in structure with myths and movies and the like. *Feeling dumb* Man, he's younger but got me beat on this subject....

[Windúril]

yeah, good job wind! We just used him in terms of researching and identifiying similarities in structure with myths and movies and the like. *Feeling dumb* Man, he's younger but got me beat on this subject....

Eh...I'm in all those advanced classes Phoenix. Like I'm taking college courses right now. Don't worry about such a little thing. All it means is I have less of a life than you. *gives phoenix a cookie*

[pheonixfire]

Yeah!!!! Cookie!!!! It doesn't meant thta u have a less of a life, it means that u are better experienced!!!!

[gogo]

Ooo...gogo posted a serious thread! I'm in shock! =o

>_>

<_<

*cough*.....

and you too babbo!! >_<

and epic.....honestly just a question...no hidden motives - i just wanted to see what everyone thought. and thanks to everyone for posting! but thanks for posting, epic - miss you!!!!

[epicbard]

and epic.....honestly just a question...no hidden motives - i just wanted to see what everyone thought. and thanks to everyone for posting! but thanks for posting, epic - miss you!!!!




awwwwwwwww *huggles* *clings* when ya gona come back? I miss you!

:) good luck in school!

[MommyRogers]

If a person is only as faithful as their options, then it isn't love.

I'm almost up to year 15 of my marriage - we've had jealousy, many turns of financial troubles, we've disagreed on "who's the boss" (still do :D ) but we've decided we're in it for the long haul. Love is a choice you make every day, when your partner is being a miserable dutz, or when they're being wonderful. Love is pretty hard to define, really. I know I've got it though . . .

[Pixie]

yeah me too!^^